Civil Protection: Halloween Safety

Civil Protection: Halloween Safety

[Subtitles by danielsangeo] MIKE: So, is it on? MAN: Yeah, start whenever you’re ready.
It’s recording from that camera up there. MIKE: All right. Hey, folks, I’m
Mike. This is my partner, Dave. DAVE: Hey! MIKE: We’re part of your local
Civil Protection team. With Halloween coming up, we’re
here to talk about some safety issues. DAVE: That’s right. MIKE: Now, the first thing we’d
like to cover is vandalism. It always goes up around Halloween because
young people are out causing trouble and there’s only so much
we can do about it. But there’s one thing we’d really like
to focus on and that’s mailbox bombs. Not only are these illegal but
they’re simply dangerous. DAVE: Yeah, Mike’s not kidding. You can get
your hands blown off if you do it wrong and don’t know the stress-levels
of the container you’re using. MIKE: That, too. It’s a felony,
you’re destroying government property, just don’t do it. DAVE: Oh yeah, and what you
especially shouldn’t do is take a two-liter bottle of chlorine
that contains sodium hypochlorite and then mix it with some sugar and water
because then you’re just asking for trouble. MIKE: Uh, yeah, that’s not a
bad point, but, uh… maybe we should, y’know, not tell them
how to make bombs in the first place? I don’t think that’s what the sergeant had
in mind when he asked us to make this video. DAVE: Well, we don’t want
anybody making one by accident. MIKE: I don’t think that’s likely. But, uh… moving along. One thing we need to mention: if you go trick-or-treating, great, but if you go to anybody’s house
where they answer the door naked, please call us immediately. Now you may think they’re just playing
a joke or acting a little weird, but no. It never amounts to anything good. We find that’s usually just the
tip of the iceberg with these people. DAVE: Oh, man, like the Arbuckle residence,
where we went into the basement and found those three dead– MIKE: Shut up, Dave. Okay,
next item is fireworks. Now, you wouldn’t think this would
be an issue around this time of year, but we definitely get some
related injuries so be careful. DAVE: Yeah, and keep it
reasonable, guys, because if you dissolve Styrofoam
in gasoline, then you have napalm. And then there’s no end to the
kind of hell you can raise with that stuff. MIKE: Man, what are you doing? DAVE: What? MIKE: You just told them how make napalm.
I didn’t even know how to do that. DAVE: Well, it’s bad news! That stuff gets on you while
it’s burning, it’s NOT coming off! MIKE: So then, why tell them
how to make it, genius? DAVE: Don’t give me your crap! This is a lot better than YOUR idea
about werewolf attack prevention. MIKE: But that’s important! MAN: Hey, we’re still recording, guys. DAVE: Mike, that’s retarded. MIKE: Hey, shut up! [banging sounds]
My cousin got bit a few years ago by– [banging sounds]
Oh, what now? Now we HAVE to start over. DAVE: Dammit, we’re never
going to finish this thing. [banging sounds] MIKE: I thought you said that nobody
was supposed to be coming in here. MAN: They’re not! We have permission
to be here. It’s scheduled and everything… [banging sounds]
MIKE: Yeah, we hear you! Just hold on a minute! [rapid banging sounds] Do you hear this crap? Who the hell is this?! If this is some drunk, I’m arresting him. I don’t care how much it
delays the end of my shift. [rapid banging sounds] [rapid banging sounds]
Okay, OKAY! [rapid banging sounds]
What’s so friggin’ important?! [fast zombie screams] MAN: What is that?! DAVE: Get down! [fast zombie calls] MIKE: What’s going on?! [fast zombie noises] [poison zombie wheezes] [man screams] [fast zombie noises] [fast zombie screams]

100 Replies to “Civil Protection: Halloween Safety”

  1. the combine is using a system to sterilize humans so they cant have children.their are no more children they all grew up and no more were born

  2. Yeah, there's always party people and young adults.

    And yes, no kids in the HL series. The Combine have some air-wave mechanic the deletes the urge for sex and reproduction.

  3. Not the urge, but the /possibility/
    Even if the urge was gone, don't you think people would still do it? There would still be kids about, plus I'm pretty sure one of the first breencasts was talking about how they basically turned off the human reproduction system.

  4. It breaks down certain proteins so everyone becomes sterile, but not temporarily. That's why when the suppression field is diactivated, Kleiner tells everyone to get down wid it.

  5. it would be funny if Mike and Dave took their masks off and it was really just Gordon and and Barney in disguise

  6. Have to admit, I did almost make that exact same thing by accident. Thanks for saving my hands Dave! 😀

  7. 2:07 anarchist cookbook napalm can be made by styrofoam and gasoline you pour some gasoline in a bucket and you keep on putting styrofoam in until you get this slime looking product and bingo napalm

  8. I like that in this universe Civil Protection is pretty nice, and they seem to not be anywhere near as abusive as they are in the actual hl2

  9. Well, it's gonna be hard to explain to the NSA how I accidentally watched a video that told me how to make napalm as well as bombs.

  10. I like to think freeman got a job in civil protection,with mike being a fake name so he does'int go to jail for mass genocide.

  11. Isn't that the guy who didn't cast a shadow? Did Mike catch him and conscript him into AV for the Civil Protection?

  12. Fun fact: Apparently the fast zombie scream is actually just a sped-up version of the "Howie Scream", which is a stock scream recycled through decades of media like the Wilhelm scream.

  13. You sure do learn something new everyday.. such as how to make napalm.. I might do that some time.

  14. I just imagine:
    Official: you sure you wanna do this in the part of the city infested with zombies?
    Dave: Cheaper that way. No competition
    Mike: I mean, the official IS right. We could freakin die!
    Dave: Not with out trusty pistols!
    Mike: Hey dude, can we have SMGs if we record there?
    Official: What? No!
    Mike: Damn it
    Dave: Mike we'll be fine!
    Mike: Fine. But don't say i didn't warn you

    afterwords in the med-bay

    Mike: I hate Dave so much
    Camera man: That was HIS idea? why did you agree at all?
    Mike: I wanted to shut him up.
    Camera man: hey where is he?
    Dave (in nurse costume over his CP uniform): Hey guys!
    Mike & Camera man: damnit


  16. Does the Napalm thing get anyone else thinking of Freeman talking about the "asphalt tumors"?

  17. So…… Mike and Dave died to the fast zombies , and the man was eaten alive by that poison zombie. Then they were put in another universe 😀

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